Monday, April 24, 2017

7 Round Miami Dolphins Mock Draft George Costanza Edition

George Costanza: Why did it all turn out like this for me? I had so much promise. I was personable, I was bright. Oh, maybe not academically speaking, but...I was perceptive. I always know when someone's uncomfortable at a party. It became very clear to me sitting out there today, that every decision I've ever made, in my entire life, has been wrong. My life is the opposite of everything I want it to be. Every instinct I have, in every part of life, be something to wear, something to eat...its all been wrong....

Jerry Sienfeld: If every instinct you have is wrong, then the opposite would be right.

George Costanza: Yes, I will do the opposite.

Yes indeed. We all know what Miami needs. But what if the opposite were true??? In this edition, I am going against all conventional wisdom and not trading back at all. I am utilizing a computer app to pick for all the other 31 teams. Lets see how Constanza would do with the Dolphins instead of the New York Yankees.

Round 1 Pick 22:  All the conjecture has been about Miami drafting a guard or DE or LB in the first round. But solving the OL issue doesn't necessarily mean we draft Forest Lamp while moving Tunsil to LT. Oh no. We do the opposite. We draft Cam Robinson the LT out of Alabama and leave Tunsil at LG. Robinson, 6'6", 322 LBS is a 3 year starter at left tackle against some of the best defenders in the country. He is a road grader and needs some work on his balance in pass protection so he could slip to us.

Round 2 Pick 22:  Instead of an OLB how about an ILB we can move to OLB like Jarrad Davis out of Florida. He is a thumper and can cover a lot of ground which makes him a good fit as a 4-3 OLB. The best part about Davis is he has great personal character and will be a safe pick for us.

Round 3 Pick 22:  Most teams want to play it safe in the early rounds. But we are doing the opposite so lets gamble on Sidney Jones, CB out of Washington, who tore his Achilles tendon at his pro day. Jones was the top rated CB prior to his unfortunate injury and no one knows for certain if he will come back as the same player. However, Wake came back from the same injury and I believe we feel confident about Jones' ability to fully recover.

Round 5 Pick 22:  We just traded for Julius Thomas and added dear ole Anthony Fasano to go along with MarQuies Gray and Chris Pantele. So what do we need another TE for? Because Bucky Hodges out of Virginai Tech fell to us. When you are 6'6", 257 LBS and run a 4.57 40, we will find a spot for you. Hodges has plenty of work to do with his route running but he will have 2 quality veterans to learn from. He also needs some work on catching but again this guy is an athlete that can grow into a matchup nightmare.

Round 5 Pick 34 (Comp):  We just picked up Nate Allen and TJ McDonald. The later will be a stud for us at FS during the last 8 games of the season when we play both the Pats and Bills twice, plus the Raiders, Panthers, Broncos and Chiefs. So we should be all set for that part of the season on the back end of our defense. And we have serviceable players to go along side of Pro Bowl SS Reshad Jones in Walt Aikens and Michael Thomas. And that's exactly why we will grab Rayshawn Jenkins out of Miami. He is a 6'1", 214 LBS and runs a 4.51 40. He may have to work his way up the totem pole to get playing time at Safety but he would be a steal in the 5th round.

Round 5 Pick 40 (Comp):  Depth on the OL is a concern and a 5th round pick for a big conference guy we can develop to play guard in the future wouldn't hurt. Looking for guys with big time experience to handle the pressures of blocking real mean men out there on the field is the ticket. But we are doing the opposite and grabbing Collin Buchanan, out of Miami, Ohio. He played RT in the MAC and at 6'5", 316 LBS he has quick enough hands to move inside. He is a 2-3 year project to develop as a starter.

Round 7 Pick 5: You gotta love Ryan Tannehill. His stats have proven him to be a top 10 QB. He  actually has the highest completion percentage of passes over 20 yards. Haha to all those RT haters. We also have the loveable Matt Moore and of course the amiable Brandon Doughty. We are all set at QB. That's why we are grabbing another QB and another one with limited experience against big time talent. Sounds a bit like RT. Our last selection was 3rd in the ACC for completions beyond 20 yards, behind Deshaun Watson and Lamar Jackson. He is only a Junior and many believe he is making a mistake coming out early with only 1 year under center but Jerod Evans, out of Virginia Tech, prefers to learn and gain experience from Adam Gase. Evans is pretty burly at 6'3", 232 LBS. He could eventually become a Ben Roethlisberger type of QB who is just a beast to bring down. He needs a lot of work but he should at the very least push Doughty. 

There is our opposite draft and Thursday Night will prove who was right.

Phins Up!!!

Carl Leone
Dolfan since 12/25/1971 

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Horrible... but amusing, like all these mocks. Other than J. Davis, I sure hope this is the Costanza version!


Luckily, Grier isn't unemployed and living with his parents.


We need a big time...mean...thumping LB to complement Suh's nastiness...!


Davis is your man


I would love Lamp in the first and Davis in the 2nd the BPA. In a perfect world, we trade back 5-6 spots in the first and pick up another 2nd and 3rd round pick. A desperate team for a QB just may do that if 3 of them go ahead of us...


I like trading back too as long as either Lamp is still there at our new slot or we get Dion Dawkens out of Pitt or Dorion Johnson out of Temple in the second round. Keep in mind the Broncos and Giants need OL help too with the Broncos 2 picks ahead and the Giants picking right behind us.


No way Davis is there in the 2nd, Lamp is good but a starting guard can be found later. Tonsil was a great pick because he was an actual NFL LT where Lamp isn't, go linebacker first and cb or de 2nd


No way Davis is there in the 2nd, Lamp is good but a starting guard can be found later. Tonsil was a great pick because he was an actual NFL LT where Lamp isn't, go linebacker first and cb or de 2nd