Friday, November 08, 2013

Bullygate Weekend Update

The NFL has announced the term "Bull Rush" will now be replaced with "gently directing the opposing lineman towards his quarterback's face".

The Dolphins have changed their fight song to "Woolly Bully".

Jonathan Martin's attorney issued a statement on his client's behalf.  In it, David Cornwell states that Martin "is not soft!".  He then added that Martin will be the new spokesperson for Charmin.

Patriots Head Coach Bill Belichick charged the Dolphins with Bullying for leaving dirty socks in the visitors locker room at Gillette Stadium.

Parlaying the embarassment of the Bullying scandal, Dolphins Owner Stephen Ross has negotiated a new deal for the stadium naming rights with Red Bull.   

Dolphins Head Coach, Joe Philbin has announced the in flight movie to Tampa Bay will be reruns of "Barney".  Said Philbin, "There are qualities in that show that I'd like our team to display on Monday nite and why look for trouble?"

In order to limit exposure to future litigation by Martin, Dolphins attorneys have warned the players and coaches that in the event of any questionable calls by officials they are not to yell "Bullshit!".

When asked his opinion of bullying in the locker room, Hall of Fame Coach Don Shula stated "How do you think we went undefeated!"

Phins Up!!

Carl Leone
Dolfan since 12/25/1971
Carldleone@aol.com

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